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Category Archives: True Inspiration

For the Fellas


Today I want to celebrate MEN! I know we have a world full of cheating, lying, scheming ass men but there are still a few good men left. Today is the day for the man who is taking care of his business by being faithful, loyal, trustworthy, a provider, a friend, a lover, a supporter………basically an all around good guy. Thank you for being YOU! To all the men who was once before a lowdown dirty dog and decided to turn over a new leaf, Thank you!  I know sometimes you feel out numbered and that you have to pay for the sins of another man. Keep doing what you are doing! It’s your day, embrace it. Women may talk about how men are jerks but the bottom line………We still need and want you…….not to mention we love you!

Let me tell you what women love about you:

  1. your drive and ambition
  2. your confidence
  3. your honesty
  4. your sense of humor
  5. your appearance
  6. how you defend her honor
  7. how you handle business
  8. how you take care of your responsibility

Fellas, you are very strong and sexy! God created you just for us. How could we not love that?

To all the women, tell your husband, your boyfriend, your lover, your friend that today his day and he is Awesome!!

Ladies, what are some things you love about men?  Share an awesome experience you had with a man whether it’s your husband, father, brother, friend, etc.

Fellas feel free to give feedback. We want to hear from you.

Have a Happy & Wonderful Father’s Day!!

Dr. Truthseeker

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Blog of the Year 2012….Honored and Surprised

Blog of the Year Award 1 star jpeg

First the One Lovely Blog Award and now the Blog of the Year 2012 Award…………Speechless!!!

Words really can’t express how grateful I am to the very talented blogger that nominated me for this award. Thank you so much YOU’RE JUST A DUMB ASS for this nomination! Thank you for following my blog and giving encouraging feedback.  I also would like to thank you for sharing your talent and wisdom in the world of blogging.  This is truly an honor!

The ‘rules’ for this award are simple:

  1. Select another blog(s) who deserve the ‘;
  2. Write a blog post and tell us about the blog(s) you have chosen – there’s no minimum or maximum number of blogs required – and ‘present’ them with their award;
  3. Include a link back to this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Awardat theThought Paletteand provide these ‘rules’ in your post (please don’t alter the rules or the badges!)
  4. Let the blog(s) you have chosen know that you have given them this award and share the ‘rules’ with them
  5. You can now also join our Facebook group – click ‘like’ on this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award Facebook groupand then you can share your blog with an even wider audience.
  6. As a winner of the award – please add a link back to the blog that presented you with the award – and then proudly display the award on your blog and sidebar … and start collecting stars…

My list of nominees are as follows:

Single & Happy

memoirs of a woman with chutzpah

YOU’RE JUST A DUMB ASS

Truthseeker411

Such an Honor…..One Lovely Blog Award

Imagine my surprise when I received a message that I had been nominated for the One Lovely Blog Award!

It’s such an honor to be nominated by http://yourejustadumbass.wordpress.com/ for the One Lovely Blog Award! Thank you so much for the nomination and your blog is awesome! You rock! Check out the latest post from http://yourejustadumbass.wordpress.com/2012/10/22/lets-reframe-hurt/.

I have blogged for a year now and the journey has been great. I have come across many wonderful bloggers who put their hearts and souls into creating magnificent posts. Lately, I’ve had a case of writer’s block, but this may just be the key to get my juices flowing again 🙂

If you are one of the nominees for the One Lovely Blog Award you must do the following:

  • Thank the person who nominated you and link to them in your post.
  • Share seven random facts about yourself.
  • Nominate other bloggers or blogs.
  • Contact the bloggers you nominate to let them know and to link them back to your post so they can read “The Rules,” too.

one-lovely-blog-award

Seven Random Facts About Me

1. I have a HUGE crush on Michael Ealy! I would love to go on a date with him one day.

2. I’m really a timid person.

3. I’m planning to create another blog in the future.

4. I had dreams of becoming a psychiatrist before becoming an elementary teacher.

5. I would like to write a book someday.

6. My favorite word is persnickety..perhaps it’s because I am persnickety.

7. I think picnics are romantic.

Blogs I Enjoy/My List of Nominees

Love, Lust and Everything in Between

Facehookin’

theredheadedwriter.com

Single & Happy

chocolatecoveredliesdotcom

memoirs of a woman with chutzpah

Ella Elle L’A

Misadventuresin Cleveland Dating

YOU’RE JUST A DUMB ASS

The Oven Mitt

Black! Not White Dipped in Chocolate

Married Spice

Cleo’s Dating Blog

Quest for the Perfect Curl

Girl Whisperer

Truthseeker411

For the Love of Our Black Sisters

A friend of mine shared this with me on Twitter. I thought it was a very good post and of course I wanted to share it on my blog. This post is written by a talented brother. His insight is on point. So without further ado introducing darcwonn1906 from http://chocolatecoveredlies.com/. Check it out!!

I love black women.

Let me be honest, I love black women and I have no problem saying it. This does not mean that I don’t appreciate Caucasian or Asian women, either. It does not mean that I will discriminate. What it DOES mean is that throughout the trials, tribulations, and whatnot that I may go through with a black woman, I still love them. I was raised by one. I have a twin sister and a daughter. I am dating a black woman. My love for black women is undying.

But can I say the same for other black men? Astoundingly, yes I can. But, the problem is that so many have been blinded by “lack of black love” that they make their disparaging remarks in public or “in music” [1]. Many black women feel slighted by this. Others may “protest”. In turn, there are a few of us that make our situation hard.

My chocolate covered lie? Cool, let us get into it: black men don’t want black women anymore.

Are we all ready for this journey? Because you know I am.

Why This Issue?

I picked this issue because it is important to our race. We are one (if not the only) race that has internal male/female relationship issues. So much is given to our race due to our “divide and conquer” attitudes as of late [2]. Even the media has helped us along the way with the discrepancy. This issue is important because so many are lost on whether or not we, as a people, have these issues with each other.

The Stereotypes

I noticed some artwork by Philadelphia based artist Alex L on Facebook. The work breaks down some aspects that men find troubling:

1.) Our women don’t support our men: I can’t even say this with a straight face. Our women probably OVERSUPPORT our men (in certain cases). Some of it happens to the point of nausea. Yes, there are quite a few women that don’t. Then there are others that are “tired of it” and need us to “step it up” [3]. Whichever side of the spectrum one may reside, I’m not buying into the “our black women don’t care about us” idea. I refuse to. It just isn’t true.

2.) Black men getting with white women due to lack of choice: First of all, you seriously have to be “lame” or “living in the wrong area” to lack choice in women. Some actually enjoy their partners regardless of color. There are some that do it “because they are tired of black women”, but women are women. They will nag, be combative, or mean regardless of race. Plus, many interracial relationships have a smaller rate of becoming marriages than same race dating [4]. So, take it as it is: even interracial relationships aren’t guaranteed to work.

3.) Many black women are “too independent” and “self-serving”: Plenty are. And plenty are not. Please don’t believe the hype of our black women not loving themselves. There are increases in women going back to natural hair styles and holistic living [5]. Also, there are plenty of women in touch with their heritage. I know a lot of women that can cook and are submissive to their men.Oh, and trust me: plenty of women cannot STAND the “Nicki Minaj clones” that run around here. Just the truth.

The Skinny

Black men, please love your black women. If you do, please act like it. We can’t keep going around as if our women aren’t good enough or they don’t love us. They do. Sometimes, they are just frustrated by us. Or, they are purely misled. Whichever way it goes, it we want to mend this situation we need to start being realistic. Truth be told, there is nothing like Black Love anyway.

‘Nuff said and ‘Nuff respect!

Click here to check him out! For The Love of Our Black Sisters: CCL #30 (chocolatecoveredlies.com) Be sure to check out Part 2 to this Post………….For the Love of Us Black Brothers

Show him some love…………What are your thoughts?

Truthseeker411

The Secret is Out…….Who’s at Fault?

I stumbled across this story yesterday and found it intriguing. It was interesting because of what people had to say about it. Below is a summary  from the Ryan Cameron Show on V103 in Atlanta.

A Cobb County woman kept her HIV positive status secret from her boyfriend for nine months! He was rambling through her cabinet and found her medicine. He then Googled the name of the medicine to see what it was for and found out that it was a treatment for HIV. After confronting her about the medicine, she confessed and ran to Texas. In a situation like this who is more at fault?

People had a lot to say about the fact that she kept her status a secret during their 9-month relationship. Some folks feel she should be punished to the fullest extent of the law. Some people feel they should have been tested before they decided to have unprotected sex. Others feel the guy was stupid for not having protected sex. As I read more and more of the comments, people were dogging the brotha out for not protecting himself. More of the blame was shifted on him instead of her. I just found it to be ironic because a lot of men have engaged in unprotected sex knowing that they were HIV positive and in general there was no empathy for them. Immediately, we are ready to throw the book at them. Locking them up and throwing away the key would be too easy. It’s seems we have more empathy for a female who keeps her status a secret. Why is that?

Well my thought of the matter is that they are both at fault.  If she kept her status a secret and knowingly infected him, she should have to pay for her crime. A lot of men and some women have been convicted of using their HIV positive status as a deadly weapon. It was her moral duty to disclose her status to him. It was also his duty to protect himself.  It is 2012 and we should not be putting ourselves at risk.  Don’t be so trusting. We should not be too comfortable with having unprotected sex.  If you are in an exclusive relationship, get tested together on a regular basis. If you are not in a relationship, get tested on a regular. HIV is just like a bullet. It doesn’t know age, color, race, gender, or financial status. When it strikes; it strikes!

I know I blog about a lot of random stuff that happens in the world of dating but this is certainly The Truth About Dating. Know Your Status! Get tested! That’s real talk!

Who do you think is at fault in this situation? The man, the woman, or both? What are your thoughts?

Truthseeker411

   

For more information about HIV/AIDS http://www.aidsinfo.nih.gov/

Click on the link for  a list of U.S. prosecutions for  HIV exposure. www.hivlawandpolicy.org/resources/download/456

Celebrating Love

Today is a celebration of love! Hopeless romantics eagerly awaits this day with great anticipation. Children are excited about the cards and candy they will receive. Wives, girlfriends, and significant others are overjoyed by the fact that they will receive flowers, balloons, candy, diamonds, or jewelry. Men are pulling out all the stops just to see their special lady smile.  Some singles will dread this day and other singles will embrace it. No matter what this day comes every year, so here’s a BIG KISS and a Happy Valentine’s Day to You!

Smooches!!!!

Truthseeker411

Circle of Sister Friends

 Sisterhood- 1. The relationship between sisters. 2. The feeling of kinship with and closeness to a group of women or all women.

Do you have a circle of sister friends that you share the bond of sisterhood with? Do they embrace you, speak positive things in your life, have only your best interest at heart? A couple of weeks ago,  I was spending time with my sorority sisters and later I started reflecting on women,  friendship, and sisterhood. I started to think about how blessed I am to have true sister friends in my life. I have developed some friendships that will last a lifetime. I have friends that I have been friends with since grade school, high school, and college. I know I have a circle of sisters that will be there for me no matter what. They keep me grounded.

I started reflecting more when I was watching an episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta.  I was watching how Ne Ne, Sheree’, and Kim are no longer friends. They can’t even be civil or cordial to each other. I was also looking at how the entire cast is rather catty and no one really has any loyalty. Now I know it is just a TV show and perhaps there is added fluff for ratings. I guess what I am really trying to say is that yes some  friendships may be broken beyond repair or maybe you won’t have a sister friend bond with all friends; but I think as women we should always stay positive. We need to stay away from the envy, strife, backstabbing, negativity, and being catty. Why do some of us feel the need to compete, undermine, and disrespect each other? We need to have love and respect for each other. We need to lift each other up and be happy when something good happens.

In an article from Essence magazine, First Lady Michelle Obama said it best. ” Women energize me. We kind of hold each other up.” She  says she refuels her spirit by connecting with a small group of girlfriends. With all of her duties as wife, mother, and first lady; she make time to have dinner or just enjoy a girl’s night out.  She continues to say that President Obama is terrific , he is her true partner and spending time with him is key. But it is also important that women find each other and that’s where the natural reenergizing happens.
Read more:  http://www.essence.com/2011/09/28/the-leading-lady-michelle-obama/#ixzz1knxjn4j0

I say to you ladies let’s embrace each other. There is strength in numbers. Find you a circle of sister friends. Also when we see each other in the work place, salon, gym, grocery store, mall or where ever, say something nice and don’t judge. There is nothing like a world full of beautiful women. God created a wonderful thing when he created us.

“Sisterhood is many things. It’s a warm smile on a cold and rainy day, a friendly hug, a cheerful hello… It’s all that a good and lasting friendship is, only better. It’s treasured. It’s sacred. It’s knowing that there will always be someone there for you. It’s dreams shared, and goals achieved. It’s counting on others and being counted on. It is real.”~Author Unknown

This is just my latest rant, ramble, or shall I say reflection. 🙂

 Happy Founder’s Day to My Beautiful Sisters of Delta Sigma Theta, Incorporated, January 13, 1913

Truthseeker411

Who me? A Dream Snatcher

Are you a dream snatcher or the voice of reason?

This morning I was listening to the Tom Joyner Morning Show while driving to work. Tom, Cybill, Jay were discussing Jennifer Hudson. They were talking her setting a wedding date to marry her fiance’ David Otunga aka “Punk” from the I Love New York Reality Show. You know the one……. the spinoff of another crazy ass show Flavor of Love.  I’m not sure if it is accurate or where their source came from but according to TJMS, Jennifer wants David to quit wrestling before they get married. He supposedly turned down a lucrative job offer at a prestigious law firm with a salary well into the six figure range. Jennifer wants him to pursue something real, even though wrestling is a six figure income for him. He says he enjoys wrestling and wants to make it his career. I guess he really likes showing of those big arms and chest. I’m not sure if he is any good at wrestling.

Is Jennifer right in feeling this way?  He does have his law degree. Why would he want to be the next Hulk Hogan? Of course saying my husband is an attorney rolls of the tongue better than my husband is a professional wrestler. However, he is the same guy that competed for the love of New York on that ridiculous reality show. Perhaps Mr. Otunga just wants to be famous like his future wife. I guess being a lawyer, does not bring him the same fame. Well Tom and Jay said Jennifer is a dream snatcher. She should support his decision to be a wrestler no matter how corny it is. Cybill says she understands where Jennifer is coming from and someone has to be the voice of reason. Now I know people could care less about their relationship, but issue at hand is relevant.

Some husbands, wives, significant others, friends, and family are not very supportive and tend to kill dreams whether intentional or not. They fill your head with negative thoughts. By the same token, they are the voice of reason when you are being foolish making a decision you will regret. Sometimes it’s hard to see if they have your best interest at heart. I say if it is something that you are passionate about, go for it whole-heartedly. Make your dream a reality by actively pursuing it and if the person truly loves you they will be supportive no matter what.

So Truthseeker fans, do you think Jennifer is a dream snatcher or is she the voice of reason? Are you a dream snatcher? Do you have a dream snatcher in your life?

Truthseeker411

Celebrating Solo

What do the lonely do at Christmas?

That’s the question that the group, The Emotions ask in their unforgettable holiday song. Have you truly listened to the lyrics. That song is depressing! Don’t get me wrong it’s a nice song and I look forward to blasting it along with other Christmas Classics every year. Listening to it over and over would drive me insane! Click here to listen to the song……… http://youtu.be/rOn1gyor4mk

So here is my question…………Who said you had to be lonely for Christmas?

Many people will spend Christmas alone whether single, divorced, married. There are many reasons why people will be alone for Christmas but it doesn’t have to be a sad or depressing time. There are many things you can do to occupy your time during the holidays. The key is creating your own joy. Here is a list of things that you can do to make your holiday one to remember:

1. Break the normal holiday tradition and create your own tradition.

2. Consider an exotic island getaway-Bahamas, Jamaica, or Cancun.

3. Volunteer for a good cause-Shelters could always use the extra help. It would really warm your heart to help others.

4. Surround yourself with others that may be alone for Christmas and have a dinner party or go out and do something fun.

5. Indulge yourself in the things you like to do. Whether it is a cooking, watching movies, reading books, or creating something.

Don’t let the fact that you are alone, stop you from having fun on Christmas. There are many things that you could do by yourself on Christmas, that maybe will not be as much fun when done with someone. You never know, you may just have one of the best Christmases this year.

P.S. Whatever you do don’t listen to that song over and over! 🙂

Share your thoughts or comments.

Truthseeker411

The Ike and Tina Effect

This weekend I walked in the Domestic Violence Walk. This is the second year that the New Beginnings Domestic Violence Organization held the walk in honor of so many victims that have experienced domestic violence or still experiencing it. Today wraps up Domestic Awareness month and of course National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. The awareness and the fight must continue.

The Ike and Tina Effect has been going on for decades. Many women have been victims of domestic violence. The number continues to grow in young women. So just what is Domestic Violence?Domestic/dating violence (also known as intimate partner violence) is a pattern of controlling behaviors that one partner uses to get power over the other.

    • any kind of physical violence or threat of physical violence to get control
    • emotional or mental abuse, such as playing mind games, making you feel crazy, or constantly putting you down or criticizing you
    • Sexual abuse, including making you do anything you don’t want to do, refusing to have safe sex or making you feel badly about yourself sexually.

 Here are some facts for you:

  • About 95% of all domestic violence victims are female. The majority of male victims are assaulted by other men.
  • One third of American women and one-quarter of women worldwide will experience domestic/dating violence in their lifetime.
  • An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year. Some studies say the numbers are even greater – up to 5.3 million – since most assaults go unreported.
  • Only 25% of all physical assaults perpetuated by intimate partners are reported to the police.
  • Females who are 20-24 years of age are at the greatest risk for intimate partner violence.
  • On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in this country every day. That’s more than 1,100 women a year.
  • Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women – more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.
  • One half of all homeless women in the country are fleeing from domestic violence.
  • Women are more likely to be attacked by someone they know rather than by a stranger.
  •  Domestic/Dating violence costs the US $5.8 billion annually in health related costs, with $4.1 billion for victims needing medical and mental health services.

Those statistics are alarming!  It is an epidemic affecting people in every community, regardless of age, economic status, race, religion, nationality or educational background. The good news is that help is available for the victim and the perpetrator. Domestic Violence is a learned behavior; therefore, it can be unlearned.

This brings me back to the movie we all know and love, “What’s Love Got to Do With It” Tina Turner let the world into her very personal and horrific story in her book, I Tina, that was later turned into the movie. Her story gave us an upclose picture of what domestic violence is like. This took place in the 60’s and 70’s. Let’s not forget about Chris Brown and Rihanna. Their story gave us a modern-day twist and it also reminded us that Domestic Violence is still prevalent. It really affects our young women. Like the character in the movie warned Tina, “It is not ok to let some muthafucker pound on you”! We need to remind our young girls, teens, and young women, that they do not have to take that abuse. We can put an end to Domestic Violence, so let’s continue the fight to end it permanently.

Choose Respect Initiative

www.cdc.gov/chooserespect

National Domestic Violence Hotline

1-800-799-SAFE

National Sexual Assault Hotline

1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

National Sexual Violence Resource Center

www.nsvrc.org

Dating Matters: Understanding Teen Dating

Violence Prevention

www.vetoviolence.org/datingmatters

Truthseeker411

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