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Because I Love Your Locks:Dating Women With Natural Hair

Today’s post features a talented blogger. I’ve shared some of his work before. I have been following his blog and I must say I am very impressed. I asked him a week ago would he consider doing a guest post for my blog and he happily accepted. I asked him to share his thoughts about dating women with natural hair. Here is what he had to say………..

Because I Love Your Locks- Dating Women With Natural Hair

Let’s be honest: hair on a woman is a beautiful thing. Regardless of race, it is always something to see. Straight, curly, or what some refer to as “nappy” is all acceptable in my world. Plus, my childish side has an inclination to play in it. Thus, I find hair to be “attractive”.

At the end of the day, I don’t care whether a woman’s hair is natural or not. However, it does excite me when there are no perms or unnecessary chemicals added. It is a lovely thing for women to accept their natural hair as their own. Also, it allows for women to be confident in their unrefined, unadulterated beauty. On top of that, many natural women know how to flaunt their styles confidently. In turn, I see as many natural women being proud of their hairstyles as women with perms and such.

Oh, one more thing: with natural women I can reference Coming to America and say my favorite “juices and berries” line.

Still, many women wonder what men think. From my experience, I will tell you this: the majority of us are going to accept you (and your hair) for what it is. That is unless it is a total mess.

In fact, there are plenty of instances where men have been excited or thrilled by the notion of a woman wearing natural hair. Many areas with enriched cultural populations have no problem with natural hair styles. So, men will go along with what is being worn. Also, there are men that have even celebrated the beauty of natural hair (see Glenford Nunez). So, there will be plenty of men excited about a natural hairstyle.

Still, there are going to be instances where men don’t like natural hair. That is totally fine. Maybe he isn’t a man you need to date. Seriously! Unless your hair is horrendous in a natural state, then you might need to reconsider a man that has an issue with your natural hair. If he wants it straightened out, you need to find out what HIS issue is. He may prefer straighter hair. He may have some “straight hair preference issues”. Either or, there are plenty of fans to cancel out those that don’t like the natural follicle expression.

At the end of the day, most men are going to go along with what the female’s hairstyle preference is (unless it doesn’t look good). If they, as black men, don’t like your hair then they you may need to leave them be. Most men shouldn’t care about hair texture anyway. Natural hair enhances the aesthetic approach of a woman’s energy and aura. It is no wonder that the natural approach to hair is gaining popularity. It doesn’t take Sampson to note the importance of strength in hair.


About the Author:

Born and raised in Gary, Indiana with parents of southern descent, Mark A. Harris is just a regular guy with a gift of gab. When he is not writing blogs for Chocolate Covered Lies or reviewing music, he will usually be teaching middle school children about Social Studies, finding time to see his intellectually stimulated yet quite daughter, or trying to figure out who can finance his first few fiction books he plans on writing. He currently resides in the Atlanta suburbs with his wonderful girlfriend. He can be reached on Twitter @darcwonn, Facebook Mark A. Harris, and email . Check out his blog

 Mark has once again delivered! This post is relevant and timely. Ladies, if you are wondering how men feel about natural hair, this man just answered. I know he can’t speak for all men and I know some men are just not down with it. It’s their preference. For every on man who doesn’t approve there’s five men who do. That’s my truth about dating!


Men, do you agree with his thoughts on women and natural hair? Ladies, did he put it down or what? Show a brotha some love!


Boyfriends Will Be Boys: Sleeping at Your Man’s Crib

I thought this was funny and just had to share. I think we all can relate to this or share a similar story from our dating chronicles. This post is from Around the Way Curls @    Check it out!

There’s nothing quite like having someone you love in your life. Everything is seemingly easier when you’re laying in their arms, watching your favorite t.v. show while receiving sweet kisses to the back of your neck. (sigh) It’s even better when your home becomes their home, and their home becomes your home. You spend endless nights together falling in love until the morning comes. The birds are chirping. The sun is shining and every thing’s coming up roses. You carefully and quietly slide out of the bed being sure not to wake him. You head to the bathroom, open the door, turn on the light and then BOOM! You see your reflection in the mirror. Your make up is smeared all over your eyes, your hair looks like Sideshow Bob and your face is bumpy and irritated from not washing it the night before. Quickly, you search his bathroom hoping to find a comb and spare toothbrush, some fash wash… hell you’ll settle for hydrogen peroxide at this point. But you find nothing. Completely against your wishes, you open the door and begin to ask your man for the very small things you need (but take for granted) in the morning.
  • You ask him for something to comb your hair out with… He passes you the brush he maintains his waves or beard with.
  • You ask him for face wash… He passes you an old stale bar of Dial soap.
  • You ask him for something to wash your hair with… He passes you some awful 2 in 1 shampoo and conditioner, probably Head and Shoulders.
  • You ask him for some moisturizer or oil for your hair… he passes you a big blue bottle of Ultra Sheen. lol!
  • You ask him for a wash cloth but they are all dirty so you use your hand.
  • His towels smell purely like the gym so you secretly use a loose sheet or oversized tee shirt you found lying around to dry.
  • You use his afro pick to detangle your hair only to find that it tangles it more.
  • Then you drip all over the place because you don’t have a hair dryer or towel to properly dry off making the bathroom floor deadly.
  • And the only thing he somewhat has right is the Coca Butter on his dresser but then you realize it’s the wack watered down kind that is more soupy than a butter. UGGHHHHH
After all is said is done you’re so frustrated that you finally blurt out “I need to leave some things over here if you want me here. I have to go to work and I don’t have anything I need to get ready. You can leave stuff at my place. I should be able to leave stuff at yours”. He looks up from his laptop or phone (while sitting in the bed looking just as good as he does all the time) and simply says, “Okay”. You smile realizing that you made a bigger deal out of everything than necessary and that you should have just mentioned it before. You crawl back in bed and give him a sweet kiss on the cheek. Moments pass and he says nonchalantly, “Babe, this is nice and all but your hair is wet and your dripping on my sheets”. You roll your eyes and grin, taking note that the two of you just shared one of those ‘relationship moments’ you only see on t.v. You sashay back to the bathroom and go about your business.
What are your thoughts? Have you been there and done that?

What Do Black Men Think of Black Women’s Natural Hair?

I’m on the journey to being natural and I have quite a few natural friends. The discussion came up about black men and their thoughts about natural hair. This post is very insightful and definitely worthy of a reblog. I would love you hear your thought about this topic. Come on men, what are your thoughts?


Black Girl Wondering and Praying...

Do you feel that black men ( in general) are becoming more accepting of natural hair on black women?

There is a stereotype that most black women with natural hair tend to date white men. I don’t feel this is true, but I can understand where the stereotype comes from. If we look at the music videos, men’s magazines and other forms of media we mostly see black women depicted with long straight hair. Even in magazines or media that are supposedly marketed at black men we see this.

The fact that black women are continuously bombarded with an image that implies that only straight hair is beautiful creates a wharped perception of beauty for both black men and black women. In recent years, it seems more black women are steering away from putting chemicals on their hair. Many women are rocking locs, twists or afros. However, many women are…

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