For the Fellas

Today I want to celebrate MEN! I know we have a world full of cheating, lying, scheming ass men but there are still a few good men left. Today is the day for the man who is taking care of his business by being faithful, loyal, trustworthy, a provider, a friend, a lover, a supporter………basically an all around good guy. Thank you for being YOU! To all the men who was once before a lowdown dirty dog and decided to turn over a new leaf, Thank you!  I know sometimes you feel out numbered and that you have to pay for the sins of another man. Keep doing what you are doing! It’s your day, embrace it. Women may talk about how men are jerks but the bottom line………We still need and want you…….not to mention we love you!

Let me tell you what women love about you:

  1. your drive and ambition
  2. your confidence
  3. your honesty
  4. your sense of humor
  5. your appearance
  6. how you defend her honor
  7. how you handle business
  8. how you take care of your responsibility

Fellas, you are very strong and sexy! God created you just for us. How could we not love that?

To all the women, tell your husband, your boyfriend, your lover, your friend that today his day and he is Awesome!!

Ladies, what are some things you love about men?  Share an awesome experience you had with a man whether it’s your husband, father, brother, friend, etc.

Fellas feel free to give feedback. We want to hear from you.

Have a Happy & Wonderful Father’s Day!!

Dr. Truthseeker

Fly Girl Movie Adaptation

This is for the Omar Tyree fans!!!

Image retrieved from Baller Alert

Actress Sanaa Lathan will play a vital part in bringing the adaptation of the “Fly Girl” book trilogy by popular Africa-American author Omar Tyree to the big screen according to The Urban Daily and Variety.

Sanaa will take on the role of Tracy Ellison, who is characterized in the book series as a successful young and sassy businesswoman with a personal life that’s as multifaceted as her endless quest for the ultimate financial security.

Precious”screenwriter Geoffrey Fletcher will be the mastermind behind the script, while Sanaa herself will serve as executive producer of the Lionsgate film in addition to her starring role.

My Thoughts

It has been years since I have read the trilogy. I would have to refresh my memory. From what I do remember, is Fly Girl is a coming of age story in the late 80’s. It was quite entertaining to read. It’s no wonder the book turned into a trilogy. We just could not get enough of the character Tracy Ellison.

I am looking forward to seeing the movie. My only problem is why did it take so long. I guess I will have to brush up on all 3 books. Who’s down with a book club!?!

The Trilogy (Fly Girl, For the Love of Money, Boss Lady)

Have you read Fly Girl or any of the books in this trilogy? Did you like it? What are your thoughts?

Dr. Truthseeker

It’s Been A Long Time……

It’s been a long time , shouldn’t have left you, without a strong rhyme to step to. ~Eric B & Rakim

Ok so maybe I’m not a lyrist, but I think that line is dope!

It has been such a long time since I have blogged. A lot has happened since I have graced you with a post. Let’s see where do I start…………First and foremost let me say I finished my dissertation….I am officially Dr. Truthseeker411. I had my final defense March 19, 2014 and graduated May 9, 2014. I will never forget those dates. That’s why I have been MIA. I had to buckle down and finish the big D. I made the decision back in August 2013 that I was graduating May 2014. I had to make that ish happen for my sanity. Therefore, blogging was pushed to the back burner. I really, really missed blogging during the time I was writing my dissertation.

You’re probably thinking what the hell have I been doing since then. Well after graduation I had surgery and then that turned into a nightmare. I ended up in the hospital for an infection. Arghh!!! I was there for about a week, and then I had to recover from that ish.  After recovery, I thought I was ready to blog again. I was wrong, so so wrong. I tried writing and I just couldn’t. I even tried to start reading books again because I am such an avid reader…….Wrong again! What the hell is wrong with me, I thought. I finally figured out what was wrong with me. My body, mind, and soul needed a long break after long grueling nights at the computer reading, researching, and writing. Basically, I have been on sabbatical. Now it is a year later and I have been thinking I really miss blogging. One of my sister friends asked when was I going to start blogging.  Actually more than one sister friend asked. I hear you ladies. It’s time to start again!

There is so much that has happened however, I can put it all in one blog post. Stay tuned!!

P.S. I really, really miss blogging!

Dr. Truthseeker

The Best Part of Waking Up

There is nothing like a big, hot cup of  Java also known as morning nookie. It’s powerful enough to get even the grumpiest person going.  I would know, since I’m that person.  Everybody knows that I don’t do mornings. My motto is “I’m all yours after 10”. The one thing that can make me smile, dance in the rain, or spread a little cheer in the morning is hot Java and I am not talking about Folgers.

Just picture this. You and hot Java cuddled up and the break of dawn starts peeking through the windows. He stirs, you stir. The next thing you know he’s stroking your hair, kissing your neck, or nibbling your ear. You’re smiling because you know what’s about to go down. Temptation must not be resisted even if you may have to rush and get ready for work. Enjoy the horizontal boogie.  Indulging in that hot cup of Joe is a must to get your day started. Most people say breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Well that’s true to a certain degree. Breakfast after morning nookie is the most important meal of the day.

Now some will disagree with me and say nookie is better at night. They would say that you are well rested after a night of nook-nook. I agree with that whole-heartedly but morning nookie is good for your health. According to Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., author of Because It Feels Good, having sex in the morning releases the feel-good chemical oxytocin, which makes couples feel loving and bonded all day long. It makes you stronger and more beautiful too!  Morning sex can strengthen your immune system for the day by enhancing your levels of IgA, an antibody that protects against infection.  Also climaxing releases chemicals that boost levels of estrogen, which improves the tone and texture of your skin and hair.

If you are tired of the day-to-day routine and need a little pick me up. Try having a nice cup of morning Joe.  You can have it dark or with sugar and cream. Either way it will benefit you and him. Take advantage of the natural wake up call that the cup of Joe exhibits. Men are wired to want nookie in the mornings.  Indulge in a morning quickie. Being spontaneous will intensify the experience.  After all the best part of waking up is a hot cup of Java!

What time of day do you like to have your hot Java?


Because I Love Your Locks:Dating Women With Natural Hair

Today’s post features a talented blogger. I’ve shared some of his work before. I have been following his blog and I must say I am very impressed. I asked him a week ago would he consider doing a guest post for my blog and he happily accepted. I asked him to share his thoughts about dating women with natural hair. Here is what he had to say………..

Because I Love Your Locks- Dating Women With Natural Hair

Let’s be honest: hair on a woman is a beautiful thing. Regardless of race, it is always something to see. Straight, curly, or what some refer to as “nappy” is all acceptable in my world. Plus, my childish side has an inclination to play in it. Thus, I find hair to be “attractive”.

At the end of the day, I don’t care whether a woman’s hair is natural or not. However, it does excite me when there are no perms or unnecessary chemicals added. It is a lovely thing for women to accept their natural hair as their own. Also, it allows for women to be confident in their unrefined, unadulterated beauty. On top of that, many natural women know how to flaunt their styles confidently. In turn, I see as many natural women being proud of their hairstyles as women with perms and such.

Oh, one more thing: with natural women I can reference Coming to America and say my favorite “juices and berries” line.

Still, many women wonder what men think. From my experience, I will tell you this: the majority of us are going to accept you (and your hair) for what it is. That is unless it is a total mess.

In fact, there are plenty of instances where men have been excited or thrilled by the notion of a woman wearing natural hair. Many areas with enriched cultural populations have no problem with natural hair styles. So, men will go along with what is being worn. Also, there are men that have even celebrated the beauty of natural hair (see Glenford Nunez). So, there will be plenty of men excited about a natural hairstyle.

Still, there are going to be instances where men don’t like natural hair. That is totally fine. Maybe he isn’t a man you need to date. Seriously! Unless your hair is horrendous in a natural state, then you might need to reconsider a man that has an issue with your natural hair. If he wants it straightened out, you need to find out what HIS issue is. He may prefer straighter hair. He may have some “straight hair preference issues”. Either or, there are plenty of fans to cancel out those that don’t like the natural follicle expression.

At the end of the day, most men are going to go along with what the female’s hairstyle preference is (unless it doesn’t look good). If they, as black men, don’t like your hair then they you may need to leave them be. Most men shouldn’t care about hair texture anyway. Natural hair enhances the aesthetic approach of a woman’s energy and aura. It is no wonder that the natural approach to hair is gaining popularity. It doesn’t take Sampson to note the importance of strength in hair.


About the Author:

Born and raised in Gary, Indiana with parents of southern descent, Mark A. Harris is just a regular guy with a gift of gab. When he is not writing blogs for Chocolate Covered Lies or reviewing music, he will usually be teaching middle school children about Social Studies, finding time to see his intellectually stimulated yet quite daughter, or trying to figure out who can finance his first few fiction books he plans on writing. He currently resides in the Atlanta suburbs with his wonderful girlfriend. He can be reached on Twitter @darcwonn, Facebook Mark A. Harris, and email . Check out his blog

 Mark has once again delivered! This post is relevant and timely. Ladies, if you are wondering how men feel about natural hair, this man just answered. I know he can’t speak for all men and I know some men are just not down with it. It’s their preference. For every on man who doesn’t approve there’s five men who do. That’s my truth about dating!


Men, do you agree with his thoughts on women and natural hair? Ladies, did he put it down or what? Show a brotha some love!

Happy Weight

Ok Ladies……….Have you ever been hanging around the house with your new sweetheart, and couldn’t wait to unbuttoned your jeans? Not because you wanted to get busy, but because the jeans were feeling snug.

Most of us have fallen victim to the dreaded weight gain when happiness strikes. I know I have.  Is it because we stop caring for ourselves? I don’t think so.

Picture this….. You and sweetheart are going to restaurant after restaurant; having dinner and cocktails. You have movie nights with pizza and hot wings. Then you find yourself cuddling more on the couch instead of going to the gym. Oh and not to mention enjoying those sweet treats Shari’s Berries your sweetheart is sending all the time. Then suddenly, you look up and your ass is  fat 10, 15, or 25 pounds heavier.

The thing that is most irritating is that the man usually doesn’t gain weight. Therefore, you find yourself with extra baggage and he is slim and trim. What’s even worse is when you and your sweetheart break up and you have all that weight gain…………….so not fair (LOL!) Here is what you do when you are in an exciting new relationship:

  1. When eating out, eat half of your food and take the rest to go.  Don’t try to keep up with your sweetheart. If you get dessert, make him split it with you.
  2. Limit the cocktails. If your man is guzzling all the wine, that doesn’t mean you have to compete.
  3. Instead of snuggling on the couch several nights of week, go for a walk together.
  4. Convince your sweetheart to join the gym or workout with you. You could even take dance lessons together.

The excitement of a new relationship is alway fun. You enjoy being with that special someone and doing all the wonderful things that couples do. Our hips and tummy pay the price but remember they don’t have too. Enjoy your man and still be sexy. I know…I know..It’s easier said than done.

Have you ever experienced weight gain in a relationship? Fellas, can you relate?


All I Want For Christmas……


It’s something about the holidays and cooler temperatures that make men and women want to get a cuddle boo. Perhaps it’s the romantic fires, thoughts of holiday nookie, snuggle-friendly weather, holiday parties, watching others with their boo, or just the pure thought of being lonely. They start searching high and low and when that doesn’t work out, they pull out the cell phone and scroll through the ex-files. The crew over at Bougieland refer to this as the “TapBack”. This is when an old flame reaches out because they want you back, they want to tap for old times sake, or they want to mess with your head.

I’m sure most of you have been hit with the “TapBack” call at least once or twice. I’d venture to say that you have been the initiator of the “TapBack”. 😉

My “TapBack” Story

The other day I posted pictures from the Thanksgiving holiday on Facebook. An old flame saw them and clicked like and left a comment. A day later I got a phone call from Mr. Handsome from the ex-files. We exchanged pleasantries and the conversation took a turn. He said seeing the pictures on Facebook brought back memories of our time together and it got him to thinking about how we should start seeing each other again. He went on to say that I was looking good and he would love to go somewhere for drinks and catch up. He said he’d been thinking about me for a while and he doesn’t understand why we parted ways. Hmmm Interesting

As I recalled we parted ways because we were not on the same page… among other things. It’s funny he now has amnesia. Anyway, back to the story……He continued to lay it on thick. He said I was very good to him and we should pick up where we left off. Then he had the audacity to say it’s cold and he should be keeping me warm at night. I continued to listen to his spill, laugh to myself, and shake my head. Here’s the icing on the cake:

Him: We shouldn’t be alone during the holidays.

Me: What makes you think I am alone?

Him: Are you dating someone?

Me: As a matter of fact, I am!

Him: You guys can’t be serious! I know I still have a chance with you!

Me: How do you know this?

Him: Because we are very good for each other.

Me: Wow!

Him: You are the one thing that would make my holidays complete. All I want for Christmas….is you.

I politely told Mr. Handsome we will not be tapping back. I am no one’s fall back girl. I also told him that what we shared was lovely but that’s in the past.  Loneliness is not a reason to reconnect with someone; especially if it’s temporary. Lastly, I told him to have a Merry Christmas.

I gotta give it to a brother. He really tried to be convincing but I wasn’t buying. Now don’t get me wrong, the “TapBack” isn’t a bad thing. It’s great when both parties are down with tapping back and intentions are clearly stated.  Nonetheless; as with any thing, you have to be careful.

Do you have any “TapBack” stories? Have you ever been the “TapBacker” or the “TapBackee”? Are you looking for a cuddle boo for Christmas?

Click the link and enjoy!


Carnival Cruise Warm Chocolate Melting Cake

It makes you wanna slap yo momma, it’s so good!

Two weeks ago, my girls and I sailed off into the Gulf of Mexico aboard Carnival Elation Cruise Ship. Girl’s Trip 2014 was long overdue, but I will discuss that in another post. Let’s get to the subject at hand. During dinner time, we discovered a little piece of heaven right on earth. That’s right! For dessert, we ordered the Chocolate Melting Cake. It was simply delicious! I mean amazing to the palette! I ordered this chocolately, ooey, gooey treat every night after dinner. If you have ever been on a Carnival Cruise, you know what I am talking about. From what I have read, it is very popular.

One of my girls told me I needed to learn to make this. I agreed and I said I would google it to see if anything remotely resembled this delectable treat. To my surprise, I found the recipe for this little piece of heaven. The recipe is as follows:


  • 8 ounces of semisweet chocolate
  • 1 cup (2 sticks) of butter
  • 7 eggs, divided use
  • 6 tablespoons of sugar
  • 1/2 cup of flour

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees. Melt the chocolate and butter and cool for 10 minutes. In a separate bowl, mix four eggs with sugar. Whisk. Then add flour and whisk. Add the remaining three eggs and add the egg mixture to the chocolate mixture. Pour this entire mixture into individual ramekins. Bake until just done, about 15-20 minutes (interior will be melting). Serve with vanilla ice cream. Serves 8.

The recipe is quite simple. Warning…….It’s truly addictive! To my girls, if you are reading this, let’s have a dinner party and make this ish! #forrealtho

This is a youtube video of someone making this awesome dessert.

Have you ever eaten something so good, you just had to go home and duplicate it? What was it? Do tell!!

Dr. Truthseeker411

Benefits of the Banana

  1. Bananas help overcome depression due to high levels of tryptophan, which is converted into serotonin — the happy-mood brain neurotransmitter.
  2. Eat two bananas before a strenuous workout to pack an energy punch and sustain your blood sugar.
  3. Protect against muscle cramps during workouts and nighttime leg cramps by eating a banana.
  4. Counteract calcium loss during urination and build strong bones by supplementing with a banana.
  5. Improve your mood and reduce PMS symptoms by eating a banana, which regulates blood sugar and produces stress-relieving relaxation.
  6. Bananas reduce swelling, protect against type II diabetes, aid weight loss, strengthen the nervous system, and help with the production of white blood cells, all due to high levels of vitamin B-6.
  7. Strengthen your blood and relieve anemia with the added iron from bananas.
  8. High in potassium and low in salt, bananas are officially recognized by the FDA as being able to lower blood pressure and protect against heart attack and stroke.
  9. Rich in pectin, bananas aid digestion and gently chelate toxins and heavy metals from the body.
  10. Bananas act as a prebiotic, stimulating the growth of friendly bacteria in the bowel. They also produce digestive enzymes to assist in absorbing nutrients.
  11. Constipated? High fiber in bananas can help normalize bowel motility.
  12. Got the runs? Bananas are soothing to the digestive tract and help restore lost electrolytes after diarrhea.
  13. Bananas are a natural antacid, providing relief from acid reflux, heartburn and GERD.
  14. Bananas are the only raw fruit that can be consumed without distress to relieve stomach ulcers by coating the lining of the stomach against corrosive acids.
  15. Eating bananas will help prevent kidney cancer, protects the eyes against macular degeneration and builds strong bones by increasing calcium absorption.
  16. Bananas make you smarter and help with learning by making you more alert. Eat a banana before an exam to benefit from the high levels of potassium.
  17. Bananas are high in antioxidants, providing free radicals and protection from chronic disease.
  18. Eating a banana between meals helps stabilize blood sugar and reduce nausea from morning sickness.
  19. Rub a bug bite or hives with the inside of the banana peel to relieve itching and irritation.
  20. Control blood sugar and avoid bingeing between meals by eating a banana.
  21. Eating a banana can lower the body temperature and cool you during a fever or on a hot day.
  22. The natural mood-enhancer tryptophan, helps to relieve Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).
  23. Quitting smoking? Bananas contain high levels of B-vitamins as well as potassium and magnesium to speed recovery from the effects of withdrawal.
  24. Remove a wart by placing the inside of a piece of banana peel against the wart and taping it in place.
  25. Rub the inside of a banana peel on your leather shoes or handbag and polish with a dry cloth for a quick shine.

Eat a banana! It’s good for you!

By: JB Bardot (NaturalNews)

Source Link:


Dr. Truthseeker411

7 Types of FWBs…..Say What?!



I was catching up on my Marie Claire magazines when I came across an article in the March 2013 issue. The article is “The Seven Types of FWBs”. It basically outlines the different types of friend with benefits relationships that exist. Now I’m a bit perplexed because this causal relationship has evolved into many things.

This list originated from a study conducted by Arizona State University and Northern Illinois University. It was published in the Journal of Sex Research. Check it out list!

1. True Friends (what we call TF)

Academic Definition: An important friend considered a safe sexual partner.
Translation: You actually want to hang out with him with your clothes on.

My translation: This is the original friends with benefits!

2. Just Sex (JS)

Academic Definition: Other than sexual encounters, little interaction occurs.
Translation: You only talk to him after 11 p.m.

My translation: Everyone knows this is a booty call! #cuttybuddy

3. Network Opportunism (NO)

Academic Definition: Friends whose shared network allows them to interact, typically while consuming alcohol.
Translation: He’s your end-of-the-party default option.

My translation: One Night Stand!

4. Successful Transition (ST)

Academic Definition: Intentionally and effectively using an FWB to initiate a romantic relationship.
Translation: Through your wit and charm, you’ve turned it into a real thing.

My translation: Don’t hate the player; just hate the game!

5. Unintentional Transition (UT)

Academic Definition: An FWB leads to a romantic relationship, although it was not the original intent.
Translation: Whoops! He’s your accidental boyfriend.

My translation: A Situationship gone Right!

6. Failed Transition (FT)

Academic Definition: One or both partners attempted, unsuccessfully, to generate a romantic transition.
Translation: You’re heartbroken (or he is)… And now you’re having heartbreak sex.

My translation: #EPIC Fail! or A Situationship gone Wrong!

7. Transition Out (TO)

Academic Definition: Sexual interactions between partners from a terminated romantic relationship.
Translation: Your halfhearted breakup sex lasts for months.

My translation: Too damn complicated! Stop while you’re ahead!

Read more: Friends with Benefits Types – What Your Friend with Benefits Really Means – Marie Claire

I guess causal relationships have become a little more complex. It seems like it would be little less complicated to be in an exclusive relationship. Then again causal relationships originated because people want no strings attached relationships. Whatever the case may be……Know your relationship status!


What’s you current relationship status? Which FWB are you? Is there another type of FWB that should be added?


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